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It’s April – time to return to the blogosphere

It’s April – time to return to the blogosphere

by jturkin on April 1, 2011

What excuse could I possibly give you guys for my absence? It’s been 2 months and 6 days since my last post.

  • The gang wars in Mexico have spread up the coast and I sided with the Juarez Cartel. I gave them my allegiance, they took my internet.
  • I went to Israel on my Birthright trip and had a profound experience. I am now living a pure life and have little time for trivial matters, such as the internet or blogs. My words are only for Adonai.
  • I have taken up journaling with pen and paper… okay, that one’s just ridiculous.
  • I uncovered a $2 million insurance scam where life insurance policies were issued after the death of the insured, and brought it to my boss. In return he invited me to a weekend party at his beach house. Long story sweetened, he was behind the scam, tried to have me killed, but bit the flatline himself. I spent the whole weekend trying to make him appear alive so the Hitman wouldn’t come after me. We threw some wild parties that weekend. I still haven’t recovered.

Okay, I’m too stunted to be creative. I’m on set. This is how I earn my check. By not getting in the way.

This is what I propose for April.
1) To stop being so boring.
2) To blog everyday
3) To tell you about the book I just read (The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime)
4) To tell you about 750 words… and what that means
5) To come up with more lists

I am too lazy to continue this list. Or use proper grammar. But I want you guys to hold me accountable for blogging every day. “How?” You might ask. By doing what I do to earn my paycheck.

Stay out of my way. Exclamation Point.

Don’t distract me from keyboarding everyday (I don’t like to say “write,” because that implies I’m using a pen and paper, “typing” makes me think I’m on a typewriter, so I use the verb “to keyboard” as the choice verb).

Okay. Here’s to a successful April, fools.

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